Proving the world wrong

Nov. 14, 2011

One of the first things any special needs support group will teach parents is we are our child’s best advocate. A parent knows their child best, their needs, talents abilities, and in-progress skills. In so many environments, parents have to fight for others to see and/or believe what their child can do.

They saw the 3 times out of 100 when the child executed the task and try to push aside the 97 attempts where he/she came up short. They base their confidence, by working hard that 3% will jump to 5, then 10, 25 and over 50. The journey may not be fast, but what’s important is making it to the end.

I think back to the parent meeting for Conductive Education that we had almost a year ago. The Hungarian teacher, (called conductors not therapist), explained how conductive ed works, and the breakdown of each day. “The child will walk into the classroom, with the minimum amount of support needed.” Immediately, parents’ hands shoot up into the air.

“My child can’t walk, they’re in a chair.”
“My child depends on his walker, he can’t stand on his own.”
“My child has never done that before. She’s just not strong enough.”

There seems to be only two parents in the room, not voicing concern…the two who brought Conductive Ed to central Ohio, who can’t help but smile. They sit with confidence, knowing not long ago they had the same concerns. They simply look at the other parents and say, “Don’t ask me why or how, it just works.”

The first thought that crosses the other parents’ mind, “easy for them to say, they have to sound confident to get us to try it.” However, day-by-day, week-by-week it seems to happen. Kids breaking down their own barriers, building their personal skill set and doing things no one else thought could be done.

People often ask us why we’re willing to drive 500 miles a week, and pass by dozens of other therapy facilities and adapted activities to come out to Brighter Beginnings. The answer’s simple, did you see what Nathan just did? Two weeks ago he couldn’t do it.

Therapists have fought and fought to get Nathan to hold himself on his hands and knees. He bucks out like a donkey or flops forward, whimpering in hopes you’ll stop making him suffer. For the Conductors, he’s usually willing to try his best, because he knows they’re giving him their best as well.

We’re pushing Nathan to his limits with conductive ed, preschool, horseback riding, doctor’s appointments, and everything else. It’s that time of year when colds run rampant, and we’re hoping against hope we won't be effected. Last week, Nathan wasn’t up for the challenge several days, and his sniffling over the weekend, tells us sicker days may be ahead. Yet still, today he had a smile on his face walking through the doors.

There hasn’t been any unhappiness, no fighting, crying or trying to get out of work, even when not feeling his best. He’s back to his tough-guy/ strong-guy mode. He's giving his all and knows his work is making things possible for later on.

Nathan just celebrated his birthday and with Christmas coming up, we’re frequently asked what things are on his gift list. We try to think of toys or games which can build his skills. We rack our brains for any type of clothes that fit his skinny body better. The truth is, the staff at Brighter Beginnings for Conductive Education have probably given him one of the best gifts any special-needs child could ask for — hope.

Special need parents don’t expect much from their children for the holidays, just to try and do their best, everyday. However, the day he/she checks another skill off the list that experts said they’d never do, it’s the best gift of all.

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