Roll reversal

July 24, 2011

For those who regularly read this postings on this site, you know this was our “week off.” It seems as though my life has been defined by the number of therapies, activities and appointments Nathan has filling his schedule. With all of the driving the last three weeks and coming up the next four, there was an awful lot we put in this week to try to maintain our sanity the best we could.

If you ask Nathan, it’s the week everything seemed upside down. After having everything being about him, he found himself frequently in the car, but the destination wasn’t really about him. On Wednesday night, I had a meeting so as I headed out the door for that, and left Nathan home with Annette, I saw him looking confused, as to “You’re not taking me with you? I don’t know where you’re going, but I think I should be there too.”

After a time change for speech (with a new therapist, who did a wonderful job,) we had most of the day together, but Nathan was still disappointed not to be able to go outside.

Friday morning opened a new opportunity for me. I was selected to be a judge of high school digital art for the Ohio State Fair. I took Nathan to my parents to watch him, and as much as he enjoys playing and the attention he gets from them, he still prefers it if I’m there too. As I headed towards the door, he waved, not as a sign of good-bye, but of don’t go. Still I headed out, and returned about three hours later, to a giggling guy, but one happy to have me back.

That night, we all went to meet up with a high school friend of mine in town for my class reunion. We decided to get our families together when we had time that it would be just us, and not splitting our attention with a whole room of people we hadn’t seen in 20 years. Their family consisted of 4 kids surrounding Nathan in age. There was also a large (very well behaved dog) at the house, and Nathan was enjoying the new environment. But as Nathan normally is, there was that hesitance to let Mom and Dad out of his sight, and make sure we didn’t leave.

The other kids went to an adjoining room to watch a movie, and we took Nathan in his stroller to join them. He was having a good time, probably having more fun watching the kids than the movie, but still it was something new and fun for him so we were happy. If I would look over from the other room and catch his attention, I would get that wave of, “I need to be over with you.“

I did take him over after the third time, and at first he seemed excited to be with us, but it wasn’t long before he realized the kids were much more exciting than the adults. I took him back, and the fun started back up. This time with a little more confidence that we weren’t going to leave him there. We didn’t get home until late, and Nathan was well tired by the time we made it home.

Saturday was a lazy (very hot) morning at home, with some shopping thrown in. Nothing out of the usual for us, and then we got ready for Nathan’s Miracle League game. He picked up on the fact that there was a lot more packing than usual, partly because we agreed to bring the team snack, and also because Annette and I would be headed to my class reunion (via Grandma and Grandpa’s house) afterward. The game was hot, with few participants on either team and when that was over, it didn’t take long to for him to realize this wasn’t the road home.

This time, when we pulled into my parents driveway he knew what would be coming soon. Having to watch both Mom and Dad leave was a little more disheartening for him, but Grandma and Grandpa make everything better. It was 11p.m. when the reunion was over, but only about two miles away. The weather turned into a massive storm that soaked Annette and myself getting to the car and from the car to the door. Nathan was fast asleep on the floor, a relief to us as he’s iffy about sleeping in new places. The storm kept us about 45 more minutes from trying to drive home only to look at the radar and see that it would probably keep going for at least that much longer. We braved the trek home and Annette did a stellar job driving in conditions really not intended for anyone to be out in (especially at midnight.) Another late night, and more sleep lost.

Sunday brought church and then softball, yet another non-Nathan focused activity. With only having 10 players show up, he would be left to watch and entertain himself while our team played the field. We worked to keep us all cool and hydrated in the heat. Nathan, although not where he wanted to be, was still a trooper and really didn’t complain the whole time, even with the game going to an extra inning.

It was just weird, almost like Mom and Dad were allowed to have a life, and do things for them too. So far it’s been excepted, but I kinda get the feeling, that he doesn’t want us to get used to that feeling. Still most everything revolves around his activities (as I sit and type this up outside of his conductive education class today.) It’s nice to know that Nathan will take his turn to be in places where he’s not the focus, that he can still find ways to pass the time even when he’s not the spotlight for everyone to captivate everyone’s attention. He’s such a good boy and don’t know if we tell him nearly enough.

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