Feeling his pain (or at least a little of it)

Oct. 24, 2010

I don’t know what I did, but apparently I did it in a big way. To say that my elbow hurt is a vast understatement. Then the swelling began which made it look like I had an elbow implant. I would tell you what it felt like, but too many people told me it was gross, so I’ll spare those details.

That was almost a month ago. I did go to the doctor and learned it is bursitis. An inflamed, fluid filled sac that rests at the points where muscles and tendons slid across bone. I’ve had good days and bad days. Days where I forget anything is wrong and days when tears well up if I try to touch my shoulder. Of course, it’s in my dominant arm, so I’m reminded of any movement with a shooting pain both up and down my arm causing my ring and pinky finger to go numb.

Still, I have to get Nathan around, in and out of the car, walker, stroller, high chair, bathtub, etc. I’ve still been helping with gymnastics and horseback riding, under the premise that if he’s willing to work through all of his issues, I will work through mine. During one of these activities I realized how my state is close to what he deals with, handling life with muscle tone issues and occasional limitations on range of motion.

One thing Nathan has been working on at school is learning the O-H-I-O cheer raising his arms over his head forming the letters. His O looks more like he’s playing peek, as his arms reach up only to about eye level. Annette and I work with him extending his arms all the way up, transitioning through all four letters, and he always ends with a big grin on his face, even if he knows he can't do it all by himself.

Another game Nathan and I enjoyed before my injury, was playing steamroller on the floor. I would roll over the top of him, putting my weight on my forearms and then helping him roll over on top of me. Right now I still can’t put full weight on that arm which has led to some adaptations. It’s still fun to lay on the floor and hear Nathan growl, announce his intentions to roll me, and if he puts his effort in, we still find a way to make it work.

We’ve known for a long time about Nathan’s high muscle tone in his arms and legs, and I know Annette understands the medicinal side better than I do. Ever since I’ve been dealing with my soreness, I think I now have a better perspective. It’s just another area that we feel bad because there’s likely a desire to attempt/accomplish a task, but the muscles just won’t cooperate.

For Nathan’s high tone in his legs, we still take him in quarterly for botox injections in all four of his hamstring muscles. We credit the botox as a main contributing factor in his increased desire/ability to walk allow his legs to both flex and relax building a better gait (walking) pattern.

The high tone is his arms has gotten a lot better with his own activities over the past year. When we did our intensive therapy in Cincinnati in January, the arms were a point of emphasis in our home program and I think the ladies down there would be impressed with what he’s doing now.

As for me, my 30-day supply of anti-inflammatory meds are reaching their end, and we’ll see if I have to seek out additional medical attention or not. My doctor did ask me if I have an orthopedist. I replied, not personally but my son does. She wasn’t surprised, but said she’d look into a referral for me. I know that it’s said that rest is one of the main remedies for bursitis, and I try not to overdo it, but I do enjoy my fun/playtime with Nathan as well.

I keep saying I learn a lot from Nathan, and now I can relate to him a little closer as well. I sometimes think it’s one of the reminders I apparently need to learn, that my thick skull was paying attention to any other way. Better late that never, and I’m sure there will be more lessons along the way. I just hope the future ones aren’t so painful...literally.

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